With apologies to David Letterman.
The Sox are in a hole they haven't seen since my mom was 2 months old and the Splendid Splinter, among others, was away from the team fighting in World War II. Yes, you heard me right, World War II! 1945. I've ranted, raved, pleaded, waxed esoteric, but all to no avail. All that's left is humor.
Top Ten Red Sox Excuses for 0-6 Record
10. The Front Office won't give us time off to hear Charlie Sheen talk about "Winning!"
9. 4 lb pretzels and chicken waffles just don't sit very well in the stomach.
8. Paying homage to the 1945 team, of course.
7. We always wanted to be more like the Tampa Bay Rays.
6. Nothing like lulling the rest of the division into complacency
5. What's the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame doing in Fort Myers? And why is it so damn cold??
4. What's a bunt?
3. Opening Day's tomorrow, right? What? No? Those weren't exhibition games??? Now you tell us!
2. We were glued to the tube while LeBron made "The Decision" to join up with his bazillionaire buddy who happens to own this team.
1. What, we're not playing golf?
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Fear and Loathing in Red Sox Nation
To say that things are tense among the Red Sox fanbase would be an understatement. The team is off to its worst start in 15 years and have yet to win a game. The various political factions of Red Sox Nation--we're not talking Democrats and Republicans here--are at each other's virtual throats on message boards and social media and the pundits who prematurely crowned this team World Series Champions before the first pitch of the season was thrown are now marveling at how spectacularly bad the 2011 Red Sox look.
Allow me to explain the Red Sox Nation political factions (or, if you're thinking of Red Sox fandom as a religion, sects): On one hand, you have the Panic Party, also known as the Chicken Little Society. The radical Panicists want to fire, trade, or demote anyone and everyone who contributed to a single Red Sox loss.
On the other end of the spectrum, you have the KTF Party, where KTF stands for "Keep The Faith". KTFs are the team's most unflinching cheerleaders and nothing ruffles their feathers more than the presence of Panicists. KTFs are optimistic about the team and are quick to tell anyone who expresses doubt to "jump off the bandwagon," or "go be a Yankees fan". Panicists firmly believe that KTFs reside in a deep state of denial. The fundamentalist KTFs may go as far as to say "It's still early" in September.
In the middle of the two extremes lies the Realistic Party. The Realists understand the ups and downs of a baseball season and have more patience than the Panicsts, but they have no problem voicing their frustrations with the team, unlike the KTFs. They know the team's strengths and weaknesses and they strive to be as optimistic as they can, but they know how unpredictable baseball can be. I'd like to think I belong to this group, but, to be honest, I have a strong foothold in the Panic Party as well. The Dark Side beckons, folks, and it's hard to resist...
As for the Red Sox themselves, please, for the love of all things baseball, WIN a game before the Pancists declare mutiny and storm the Fenway opener with torches and pitchforks.
Disclaimer: The part about torches and pitchforks was in jest and I do not condone such devilish shenanigans.
Allow me to explain the Red Sox Nation political factions (or, if you're thinking of Red Sox fandom as a religion, sects): On one hand, you have the Panic Party, also known as the Chicken Little Society. The radical Panicists want to fire, trade, or demote anyone and everyone who contributed to a single Red Sox loss.
On the other end of the spectrum, you have the KTF Party, where KTF stands for "Keep The Faith". KTFs are the team's most unflinching cheerleaders and nothing ruffles their feathers more than the presence of Panicists. KTFs are optimistic about the team and are quick to tell anyone who expresses doubt to "jump off the bandwagon," or "go be a Yankees fan". Panicists firmly believe that KTFs reside in a deep state of denial. The fundamentalist KTFs may go as far as to say "It's still early" in September.
In the middle of the two extremes lies the Realistic Party. The Realists understand the ups and downs of a baseball season and have more patience than the Panicsts, but they have no problem voicing their frustrations with the team, unlike the KTFs. They know the team's strengths and weaknesses and they strive to be as optimistic as they can, but they know how unpredictable baseball can be. I'd like to think I belong to this group, but, to be honest, I have a strong foothold in the Panic Party as well. The Dark Side beckons, folks, and it's hard to resist...
As for the Red Sox themselves, please, for the love of all things baseball, WIN a game before the Pancists declare mutiny and storm the Fenway opener with torches and pitchforks.
Disclaimer: The part about torches and pitchforks was in jest and I do not condone such devilish shenanigans.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Who Are These Guys Anyway?
So few games, yet already so much FAIL! When they're hitting, they're not pitching. When they're pitching, they're not hitting. Who are these guys and where are the REAL Red Sox? They look like listless pod-people, especially at the plate. Beckett, while not economical by any stretch of the imagination, has given the Sox the best start so far, only allowing 3 runs on 5 hits and no balls left the yard. The bullpen's been impressive too, providing 3 scoreless relief innings after Beckett labored through 5. The "vaunted" and very expensive offense went to sleep after Saturday night's game and hasn't woken up yet, despite the off-day and change of venue. Each inning, they keep pressing the snooze button. They're perfecting the art of grounding into the double play (someone ought to remind Tito of the existence of the hit and run or the takeout slide, anything to shake them out of the zombie-esque rollover twin-killing groundout). Frustrated with this team? You bet! Wake up, 2011 Red Sox! The season has started and the games count now! For real!
Monday, April 4, 2011
Torpedo of Red Sox Truth (apologies to Charlie Sheen)
How many of us believed the hype about the 2011 Red Sox being "The Best Team Ever," that they'd win at least 100 games, and that their World Series trophy had already been engraved? That's what the Boston press, among other media outlets had been trumpeting since the first week in December, when the Sox had acquired both Adrian Gonzalez and Carl Crawford. After a bizarre and ultimately disappointing 2010 season, Red Sox Nation was ready for some good news. A lot of us really wanted to believe that these two acquisitions would magically turn the 2011 season into another 2007. I was and I still am very happy the Red Sox got both of these players. They have talent in spades and, as far as overpaying for Crawford goes, the free agent market mandates that teams who want premium talent either overpay or miss out.
Now for the reality check, which hit the Sox like a ton of bricks on Opening Weekend in the form of a tsunami of atomic bombs flying from the Rangers' bats out of the park. Eleven total. It was a historic debacle for the Boston boys, with Ian Kinsler being the first batter in MLB history to hit leadoff dingers in two consecutive games. Something went terribly, insanely awry with Red Sox pitchers this series, to the point that none of the starters could keep the ball in the yard to save their lives. If Lester and Buchholz, the two most talented and consistent starters in the rotation can't keep home run balls from flying out left and right, who on the staff can?
The Texas Rangers deserve some credit here for being absolutely ablaze right out of the gate. The reigning AL Champs took the Red Sox to the back of the shed and bludgeoned them into submission. It was a display of power that would be awesome to see if it were coming from the Red Sox bats. They have a great team that has an excellent chance of repeating as league champions. Where they stand relative to the Red Sox remains to be seen, despite their complete dominance of the Sox this past weekend.
The Sox still have a good chance of making the playoffs, but I think expectations need to be adjusted some. In all the excitement about Gonzalez and Crawford, the fact that the rotation is the exact same as last year was conveniently overlooked. Lester doesn't turn on his ace game until May and Buchholz was the beneficiary of an unusually low BABIP (batting average of balls in play) last year. In other words, some luck played a part in his 2.33 ERA. He's still right up there with Lester in talent and will probably have a very successful season, but with a slightly higher ERA. My wishful thinking said Lackey just needed a year to adjust to being in the AL East, but it could be that his stuff doesn't work as well against the powerful offenses of this division. Beckett and Dice-K are truly wild cards. When you don't know what you're going to get out of 60% of your rotation, it's a bit of a stretch to fit them for 2011 World Series rings in December, isn't it? In April, you can put Lester in the group with Beckett, Lackey and Dice-K.
Those who are calling out Curt Young for this weekend's pitching debacle have rather short memories. Besides 2007 and maybe 2008, the Sox pitching staff wasn't necessarily tearing it up with John Farrell either. To tell the truth, I don't know how much of the 2009 and 2010 pitching problems lie with the coach and how much can be attributed to the pitchers themselves. We know Dice-K sacrificed his 2009 season to pitch in the WBC, and the Penny and Smoltz experiments pretty much crashed and burned. In 2010 Beckett was either injured or pitched like he belonged in the lower minors, Lackey ate innings, but gave up too many walks and runs for our liking and for the investment the Sox made in him, and Dice-K alternated brilliance with befuddlement. If they're going to make an October push in 2011, at least two of the three pitchers not named Lester and Buchholz need to step up and put together a solid season with an ERA under 4. Of course, Lester and Buchholz need to continue to pitch well.
After all, while it's way too soon to say the season's over after a mere 3 games, it's also way too early to call the 2011 Red Sox total bitchin' rock stars from Mars either.
Now for the reality check, which hit the Sox like a ton of bricks on Opening Weekend in the form of a tsunami of atomic bombs flying from the Rangers' bats out of the park. Eleven total. It was a historic debacle for the Boston boys, with Ian Kinsler being the first batter in MLB history to hit leadoff dingers in two consecutive games. Something went terribly, insanely awry with Red Sox pitchers this series, to the point that none of the starters could keep the ball in the yard to save their lives. If Lester and Buchholz, the two most talented and consistent starters in the rotation can't keep home run balls from flying out left and right, who on the staff can?
The Texas Rangers deserve some credit here for being absolutely ablaze right out of the gate. The reigning AL Champs took the Red Sox to the back of the shed and bludgeoned them into submission. It was a display of power that would be awesome to see if it were coming from the Red Sox bats. They have a great team that has an excellent chance of repeating as league champions. Where they stand relative to the Red Sox remains to be seen, despite their complete dominance of the Sox this past weekend.
The Sox still have a good chance of making the playoffs, but I think expectations need to be adjusted some. In all the excitement about Gonzalez and Crawford, the fact that the rotation is the exact same as last year was conveniently overlooked. Lester doesn't turn on his ace game until May and Buchholz was the beneficiary of an unusually low BABIP (batting average of balls in play) last year. In other words, some luck played a part in his 2.33 ERA. He's still right up there with Lester in talent and will probably have a very successful season, but with a slightly higher ERA. My wishful thinking said Lackey just needed a year to adjust to being in the AL East, but it could be that his stuff doesn't work as well against the powerful offenses of this division. Beckett and Dice-K are truly wild cards. When you don't know what you're going to get out of 60% of your rotation, it's a bit of a stretch to fit them for 2011 World Series rings in December, isn't it? In April, you can put Lester in the group with Beckett, Lackey and Dice-K.
Those who are calling out Curt Young for this weekend's pitching debacle have rather short memories. Besides 2007 and maybe 2008, the Sox pitching staff wasn't necessarily tearing it up with John Farrell either. To tell the truth, I don't know how much of the 2009 and 2010 pitching problems lie with the coach and how much can be attributed to the pitchers themselves. We know Dice-K sacrificed his 2009 season to pitch in the WBC, and the Penny and Smoltz experiments pretty much crashed and burned. In 2010 Beckett was either injured or pitched like he belonged in the lower minors, Lackey ate innings, but gave up too many walks and runs for our liking and for the investment the Sox made in him, and Dice-K alternated brilliance with befuddlement. If they're going to make an October push in 2011, at least two of the three pitchers not named Lester and Buchholz need to step up and put together a solid season with an ERA under 4. Of course, Lester and Buchholz need to continue to pitch well.
After all, while it's way too soon to say the season's over after a mere 3 games, it's also way too early to call the 2011 Red Sox total bitchin' rock stars from Mars either.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Seriously???
21 runs in 2 games??? 7 bombs??? Red Sox pitching so far in 2011 looks like a hot mess. Did they not get the memo about not pitching in-game batting practice to the opposing team? I know it's only two games and they're facing the reigning AL champs, but the pitching staff needs to get its act together pretty damn quick.
As for the hitters, Ellsbury, Gonzalez, Papi, and Youk are off to a great start. The rest, not so much. Pedey has one hit and Crawford, Salty, Scoots, Cameron, and Drew are 0-for-the season so far. We know that won't continue, but it would be nice to end those 0-fers sooner rather than later. Crawford doesn't worry me that much because he's a proven player in the AL East. Salty, on the other hand worries me a lot, on both the offense and the defense end. Perhaps Crawford can be dropped in the order to take the pressure off of him, as he seems to be pressing at the plate.
Tomorrow, it's Clay Buchholz' turn to try not to be clowned by the Rangers. Please, Buch, help the Sox avoid an embarrassing sweep and an 0-3 start to the season. It's up to you to be the stopper.
Friday, April 1, 2011
April Fooled
If someone would have told me that Lester would allow 3 home runs and not strike out a single batter, I would have suspected an April Fool's joke. Yet that's exactly what happened on Opening Day 2011. Continuing his history of April scuffling, Lester gave up 5 runs and let 3 balls leave the yard. After Albers, Reyes and Wheeler held the line (though Reyes walked the only batter he faced), Bard came in and stoked the Rangers' offensive fire, letting 4 more runs in, after Big Papi tied the game in the top of the 8th inning with a solo shot to left.
Despite the outcome of the game, there was plenty of good going on for the Sox: Ells reached base 4 times out of 5 on 2 hits (a single and a double), a walk and an error. He also collected his first stolen base of the season. Youk showed signs of coming out of his spring slump with a hit, an RBI and a walk. The biggest story of the game was Adrian Gonzalez, who knocked in 3 of the 5 Red Sox runs with 2 very timely hits. He took advantage of the Rangers' inattention to him at first and swiped just the second base of his career.
The other big offseason acqusition, Carl Crawford, had a day at the plate that he'd just as soon forget: 0 for 4 with 3 Ks. The bottom of the order (Cameron, Salty, and Scoots) also came up empty, save for a walk by Cameron.
The Sox did better than I'd expected against Wilson (4 runs over 5.2 innings) but their pitching just couldn't hold the leads and ties they had. Ironically, it was two of the most reliable arms on the team that did the damage. Having them both implode on one day shouldn't happen that often.
So the Sox dropped the opener, but remember, they dropped the opener in '04 and '07 as well. Just sayin... 161 games to go.
Tomorrow: Lackey vs. Colby Lewis. Let's take 2 of 3!
Despite the outcome of the game, there was plenty of good going on for the Sox: Ells reached base 4 times out of 5 on 2 hits (a single and a double), a walk and an error. He also collected his first stolen base of the season. Youk showed signs of coming out of his spring slump with a hit, an RBI and a walk. The biggest story of the game was Adrian Gonzalez, who knocked in 3 of the 5 Red Sox runs with 2 very timely hits. He took advantage of the Rangers' inattention to him at first and swiped just the second base of his career.
The other big offseason acqusition, Carl Crawford, had a day at the plate that he'd just as soon forget: 0 for 4 with 3 Ks. The bottom of the order (Cameron, Salty, and Scoots) also came up empty, save for a walk by Cameron.
The Sox did better than I'd expected against Wilson (4 runs over 5.2 innings) but their pitching just couldn't hold the leads and ties they had. Ironically, it was two of the most reliable arms on the team that did the damage. Having them both implode on one day shouldn't happen that often.
So the Sox dropped the opener, but remember, they dropped the opener in '04 and '07 as well. Just sayin... 161 games to go.
Tomorrow: Lackey vs. Colby Lewis. Let's take 2 of 3!
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Opening Day Eve
It's less than 24 hours away! The 2011 Red Sox season, which couldn't come fast enough on December 8, when The Nation learned that in addition to Adrian Gonzalez, the Sox landed Carl Crawford, starts at 4:05 pm tomorrow. Yes, on April Fool's Day. There will be no time for fooling for the Red Sox, unless you're talking about Jon Lester fooling Rangers batters.
The Opening Day lineup is as I had expected, with JD Drew sitting in favor of Mike Cameron against the tough lefty CJ Wilson:
Jacoby Ellsbury
Dustin Pedroia
Carl Crawford
Kevin Youkilis
Adrian Gonzalez
David Ortiz
Mike Cameron
Jarrod Saltalamacchia
Marco Scutaro
While some may quibble with Papi in the lineup against Wilson, I agree with Tito's deference to the veterans on Opening Day. Now if this were any other game, I would much rather see Darnell McDonald or Jed Lowrie DH-ing against a tough lefty (anything to get those lefty-killing bats in the lineup). I like seeing Cameron over Drew. Both are veterans and Tito does want to get at least ONE of those lefty-killers in there.
While the Red Sox face off against Wilson, the Rangers have a tough lefty of their own to contend with in Jon Lester. Lester is the right choice for Opening Day starter this year. He has been the Red Sox' most consistent starting pitcher over the past three years and he deserves the nod.
Lots of Red Sox and baseball blogs are trotting out their predictions for the season and most of them have the Red Sox winning the division. If they can stay healthy and perform to their level of talent, they have an excellent chance of doing so, even in a division as unforgiving as the AL East. A healthy offense will generate buckets of runs and a healthy defense should keep a good many opposing runs from scoring.
The pitching is, perhaps the most vulnerable spot for the Red Sox this year. Lester, Lackey, and Buchholz should be fine, with Lackey improving considerably on his 2010 performance. Beckett and Dice-K are the wild cards. Dice looked sharp in his last three Spring Training starts after new pitching coach Curt Young changed up his between-starts throwing routine and Beckett helped the Red Sox clown the Astros last night with 5 shutout innings. While the Astros lineup is not the Rangers, the Yankees, the Twins, etc, it was a confidence-building outing for him. Whether Dice-K's success in the latter part of Spring Training will carry over to the regular season remains to be seen, but there is reason to hope that Young's approach to the enigma that is Daisuke Matsuzaka may yield more consistent
results.
The bullpen looks to be considerably improved over last year, but all eyes will be on Papelbon and whether he can continue in the closer role, especially with the likes of Daniel Bard and Bobby Jenks waiting in the wings. Bullpen reinforcements biding their time in Pawtucket include Scott Atchison, Alfredo Aceves, and Hideki Okajima, among others.
If all goes reasonably well and the Great Injury Plague of 2010 doesn't strike again, a win total in the high 90s and/or a division title is well within reach. There's a lot of pressure on this year's team to not only make the playoffs, but to win the World Series. Can they win it all this year? Sure. Will they? I would like to think so, but baseball is an unpredictable game. Who predicted last year that the Giants would win it all? Sometimes it's a matter of what team gets hot at the right time. Other times, it's a matter of the clear superiority of one team over another.
Tomorrow afternoon. 4:05 pm EDT Ranger Stadium in Arlington Texas. Play Ball!
The Opening Day lineup is as I had expected, with JD Drew sitting in favor of Mike Cameron against the tough lefty CJ Wilson:
Jacoby Ellsbury
Dustin Pedroia
Carl Crawford
Kevin Youkilis
Adrian Gonzalez
David Ortiz
Mike Cameron
Jarrod Saltalamacchia
Marco Scutaro
While some may quibble with Papi in the lineup against Wilson, I agree with Tito's deference to the veterans on Opening Day. Now if this were any other game, I would much rather see Darnell McDonald or Jed Lowrie DH-ing against a tough lefty (anything to get those lefty-killing bats in the lineup). I like seeing Cameron over Drew. Both are veterans and Tito does want to get at least ONE of those lefty-killers in there.
While the Red Sox face off against Wilson, the Rangers have a tough lefty of their own to contend with in Jon Lester. Lester is the right choice for Opening Day starter this year. He has been the Red Sox' most consistent starting pitcher over the past three years and he deserves the nod.
Lots of Red Sox and baseball blogs are trotting out their predictions for the season and most of them have the Red Sox winning the division. If they can stay healthy and perform to their level of talent, they have an excellent chance of doing so, even in a division as unforgiving as the AL East. A healthy offense will generate buckets of runs and a healthy defense should keep a good many opposing runs from scoring.
The pitching is, perhaps the most vulnerable spot for the Red Sox this year. Lester, Lackey, and Buchholz should be fine, with Lackey improving considerably on his 2010 performance. Beckett and Dice-K are the wild cards. Dice looked sharp in his last three Spring Training starts after new pitching coach Curt Young changed up his between-starts throwing routine and Beckett helped the Red Sox clown the Astros last night with 5 shutout innings. While the Astros lineup is not the Rangers, the Yankees, the Twins, etc, it was a confidence-building outing for him. Whether Dice-K's success in the latter part of Spring Training will carry over to the regular season remains to be seen, but there is reason to hope that Young's approach to the enigma that is Daisuke Matsuzaka may yield more consistent
results.
The bullpen looks to be considerably improved over last year, but all eyes will be on Papelbon and whether he can continue in the closer role, especially with the likes of Daniel Bard and Bobby Jenks waiting in the wings. Bullpen reinforcements biding their time in Pawtucket include Scott Atchison, Alfredo Aceves, and Hideki Okajima, among others.
If all goes reasonably well and the Great Injury Plague of 2010 doesn't strike again, a win total in the high 90s and/or a division title is well within reach. There's a lot of pressure on this year's team to not only make the playoffs, but to win the World Series. Can they win it all this year? Sure. Will they? I would like to think so, but baseball is an unpredictable game. Who predicted last year that the Giants would win it all? Sometimes it's a matter of what team gets hot at the right time. Other times, it's a matter of the clear superiority of one team over another.
Tomorrow afternoon. 4:05 pm EDT Ranger Stadium in Arlington Texas. Play Ball!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)